Musings

Lately I’ve been acutely aware of my immortality. I turned a certain age (40, if you really wanted to know) and all I see are the changes in my body and these new medical procedures you have to start doing once you hit a certain age. I recently got Covid, and it hit my stamina pretty hard, and I kept thinking ‘thank God I took those vaccines cause how would I have been able to recover?’

I wonder if this new perspective will influence my writing. I do feel like I see things differently. When you’re younger, you don’t think about your immortality. You’re worried about starting a career, a family, being financially stable. It’s not until you’re settled that you think about the other stuff. It’s funny I should say that because I feel like I am not settled. Lately, I’ve been jumping to different jobs and in between writing. Writing, writing, writing. Or at least attempting to.

I have writer’s block with my manuscript. I can write my short stories, yet my novel; not so much. Talking about immortality… I wonder if I should let my novel go. Maybe start from scratch? I sort have did start from scratch, but I’m not entirely happy with it. I’m going to let it sit there and it will contemplate its own immortality.

1/15/2023 – I let a few months pass by without writing anything on here. Wish I had thought to add a date to the entry above, but I believe it’s from sometime in September that I wrote it. Many things had happened between now and then: new job, got covid, family members visited, holidays, and house hunting. It’s been a doozy. My writing schedule was on and off. I felt awful about it. But I’m kicking it into high gear. I decided to enter a contest through Writer’s Digest for my manuscript and I have until this September to turn the completed manuscript in. A deadline might pressure me into finishing it. I’m crossing my fingers on this one!

4/14/23 – I’m sitting here in my writing sanctuary. No more using my work desk as my writing desk, no more sharing the living room with my desk, and no more interruptions. I have my own space complete with a thinking chair and a view of the mountains. It is so important to have your own space in order to create any form of art – writing, music, art, etc. A designated area for thinking and imagining. It definitely helped buying a house, even though I was on the fence about it. Isn’t it funny how you say you bought a house, but it fact you’re going to be paying for it for the next 30 years?